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  • Writer's pictureBryan

Smaller portions for men.

As I’ve gotten a little older, before my vegetarian switch, I’ve noticed that even when I did head out to that amazing steak restaurant, I only ordered the petite 8oz fillet. Why? Because with the large portions that all these places serve when I’m done eating the mashed potatoes, side salad, and veggies that came with it I was stuffed! And I’m a dessert kind of guy. If I ordered the smaller steak, I had room to share a nice piece of dessert with the wife.

Marketing has taken the standard dinner menu and embellished it. Sizes are not small, medium, and large. They are now weakling, average joe, a real man. The subtle hints that you are not a real man unless you get a bigger size. Conquer your dinner. Not that you actually went out and hunted it down. Just that you can fit a bigger piece of a cow in your stomach than another man.

In fact so much so, that if you do finish 30 hot dogs in an hour, we’ll take your picture and post it on the wall with everyone else who is so proud.

A better idea would be to have a true farm. Park your car, escort your date to the table, relax with a beer. Then the waiter takes you out back with all the other guests for the 7 PM shooting. Hand you a gun, and say pick out your cow. Shoot it, then actually point out where that fillet mignon is located on it. My guess is that most men don’t have a clue where it came from on the cow, or couldn’t pull the trigger. I know I certainly don’t have a clue, and up till a few weeks ago though that was the best dinner on the planet. I’d give myself a 50/50 on being able to pull the trigger.

When you are out with your friends next time, even if you are eating the steak, try a smaller portion, see if you feel just as full. Even if we can’t get you to stop eating meat, if we can reduce our intake, we’ll save more cows, use less grain, and help save the environment. Or better yet do give vegetarian a try and order the salad. Trust me you’ll have more room for dessert.


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